THE DONKEY

The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won.

The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered in another race and it won again.

The local paper read: PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT.
The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in any more races.

The next day the local paper headline read: BISHOP SCRATCHES THE PASTOR'S ASS.

This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey. The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent.

The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline: NUN HAS THE BEST ASS IN TOWN .

The Bishop fainted.

He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey so she sold it to a farmer for $10.

The next day the headlines read: NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10.

This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the high plains where it could run free.

The next day the headlines read : NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.

Alas... The Bishop was buried the next day.

MORAL OF THE STORY???

Being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery and even shorten your life. So, be yourself and enjoy life. Stop worrying about everyone else's ass and you'll live longer.



ass·es (ass)
1. Any of several hoofed mammals of the genus Equus, resembling and closely related to the horses but having a smaller build and longer ears, and including the domesticated donkey.
2. A vain, self-important, silly, or aggressively stupid person.


2:- ass·es (ass) (Vulgar Slang)

a. The buttocks.
b. The anus.
2. Sexual intercourse.

Subject: An Intelligent Question

(thanks to Amjid Shahzad)



*While visiting India, George Bush is invited to tea with Abdul Kalam.

*He asks Kalam what his leadership philosophy is.

*He says that, it is to surround himself with intelligent people.

*Bush asks how he knows if they're intelligent.

*"I do so by asking them the right questions," says the Kalam.

*"Allow me to demonstrate. "

*Bush watches as Kalam phones Manmohan Singh and says,

*"Mr. Prime Minister, please answer this question:

*your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?"

*Manmohan immediately responds, "It's me, Sir !"

*"Correct. Thank you and good-bye, sir," says the Kalam.

*He hangs up and says, "Did you get that, Mr. Bush?"

*Bush nods: "Yes Mr.

*President. Thanks a lot. I'll definitely be using that!"

*Bush, upon returning to Washington, decides he'd better put the Condoleeza Rice to the test.

*Bush summons her to the White House and says, "Condoleeza, I wonder if you can answer a question for me."

*"Why, of course, sir. What's on your mind?"

*Bush poses the question: "Uhh, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"

*Rice was puzzled and finally asks, "Can I think about it and get back to you?"

*Bush agrees, and Rice leaves. Rice immediately calls a meeting of senior senators, and they puzzle over the question for several hours,but nobody can *come up with an answer.

*Finally, in desperation, Rice calls Colin Powell and explains the problem.

*"Mr. Powell, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"

*Powell answers immediately, "It's me, of course."

*Much relieved, Rice rushes back to the White House, finds George Bush, and exclaims, "I know the answer, sir!

*I know who it is! It's our Colin Powell!"

*And Bush replies in disgust, "Wrong, Stupid

..
it's Manmohan Singh!"